Roommate Lessons #2

So California's love returned from Europe. Apparently he lost his phone while on vacation and had been trying to call her from his work phone, but she didn't answer any of his calls. His return has been with surprising little fanfare. She's seen him a couple of times but didn't really say anything about it. When pressed, she told me they're trying to work things out.

Work things out like two different value systems.

So whether they work things out or not really isn't my concern. I'm much more concerned about my roommate who has no idea who she is, what she believes, or what she wants at the moment. She is so lost and just takes in everything this guy tells her. Really, she's not ready for a relationship, but that's for her to discover and decide and hopefully it'll be relatively painless for her.

But I've learned from her:
1. Never be in a relationship where you can't speak your mind: this doesn't mean you have to agree, this doesn't mean pick a fight. But if you don't feel comfortable disagreeing or saying what you feel, it's not healthy.
2. Don't be more emotionally invested than your partner: early on this may not apply as much, one person may fall in love faster than the other. But after a while if you're utterly distraught that he isn't calling and he only calls every four days, than maybe he doesn't care as much. If talking to you after he hasn't seen you for a month isn't a priority, he's just not that into you.
3. If you don't respect yourself no one will: you really can't expect other to love a person you don't like. Some will despite you, but when you continuously present yourself as unworthy, others will believe you. You can't expect others to not bully you or try to change you when you advertise you want to be changed. Healthy relationships with yourself are just as important as healthy relationships with others.
4. If he won't let you listen to your music, he doesn't love you. And yes, you would to pretend to like rap music just cause he does. Cause I've been playing it for months and you never liked it.

I've also learned that I will always be single cause no one will love me as much as my Mommy.